An otherwise successful, not self-proclaimed but by societal norms, young woman; my largest failure is being single. The highest value in life is love. The ability to decrease the inherent loneliness known to man. The belief that one person truly understands, respects, and supports your interests (individual and as a couple) above all else. Call me a romantic and I will say yes, an unsuccessful romantic.
One could chalk it up to timing. Admittedly, I grew tired and annoyed by the stagnation. I became childish and demanded attention through ridiculous statements and ideas. I wanted attention and reassurance, perhaps a deeper connection which was not mutually desired. I wanted to hold a hand that was already being held, or at a minimum was supposed to be held by another.
I was not mean though, just self loathing and incapable of accepting that I may have produced something better than I perceived it. Regardless of the quality, the action was genuine and the intent sincere. I wanted, above all, to show how love is supposed to be and how lovers should act.
There was a gravitation, an unexplained attraction. Improbable and relentless. If it were someone else, and not me, then I may even say it was wrong. If I could take it back then I wouldn't. A voice so comforting, a void not yet replaced. I hope that in the next year, I will be able to understand why it turned so sour. Maybe I will discover an explanation not given.
1: happy birthday!!!!!
ReplyDelete2: love the new blog design
3: being single is not a "failure," young lady
4: keep on keeping on. It's awesome to be a romantic. Because when the right thing does fall into place, you will have the privilege of experiencing and appreciating it on a deeper level than many ever will.
Much love & birthday wishes! Xo!
1: thank you!!
ReplyDelete2: thank you.
3: being single may not be a failure but it is at a minimum, a deficit.
4: awe... :)
and 5: I love the tomboy style! Thank you for the link :)